Already I am losing count of the days in my journey. I want peace but I create noise. I seek hope and stand in my own way. I need to allow The Lord to show me which bridge to cross and which road to follow. Now is not the time to blaze new trails.

How do we know if we are progressing in the right direction? Could it be the calm and peace I feel at the end of the day when I know I tried my best? I pray God is far more merciful than any any person on earth. We are all ready to judge and condemn. So ready to “cast the first stone”. We should be helping to lift the stones off of our neighbor not add to their pain. Dear Lord please strengthen me and help me to lift my neighbor up not to weigh them down.

I truly think of Christ as my brother. I can picture growing up beside him playing games that children do and helping with the daily chores. Although chores always would come first. Sharing childlike secrets. Two pictures haunt me. I see myself peering into the room where the disciples are sharing the Lord’s last supper and I have this deep hunger to join. I am thinking to myself, about the disciples, don’t you get it. The other picture that haunts me is standing below the cross helpless and shameful but with the deepest love in my heart I could never imagine.

Blind faith is a wonderful thing. Being  blind to my faith is not. I struggle not to be an al carte believer. To pick and choose what best suits any given time in my life. For example if the church interprets something and at that moment my life doesn’t suit that decision I may want to rationalize why my interpretation is different and correct. Lord give me the strength to follow your path. I want to end up at Your doorstep. Or as tradition says at Your gate leading into paradise.

The sunshine was strong and bright with promise today.  The clouds where bright white and shaped like fluffy animals in the sky. No dark clouds, no sadness only joy. I am so glad I took a couple of minutes and stopped to  soak all of this  beauty in and knowingly acknowledge my Creator.

I love the feel of the sun on my face. When I lift my face towards the sun I know God is watching over me. I search for the sun on cloudy days because I know He is there.